.....to get hurt.
Before I start on that, let me say I'm extremely pissed because I just typed this entire post, didn't save it, hit publish, and then it dis-a-freaking-peared. Figures! Since I suffer from severe short-term memory, let's see if I can remember what I wrote in the first place.
Extremely-close-to-Jesus moment #1:
The whole fam damily is in Sweetie's room doing 50 different things. I'm cleaning out the closet, kids are jumping on the bed, and Peabody's playing the piano. All is well in the world. Then Cookie forgets who she is, and assumes the identity of Spiderman long enough to put her sticky hands and feet on the window and climb a "step" or two. She turns around to see what the other kids are laughing about, and sticks her head right between the two strings that control the window blinds. She was there for all of 2 seconds before Peabody jumped up and set her free. (To do: buy blind-stringy-wind-up-thing for Cookie's protection.)
Extremely-close-to-Jesus moment #2:
About an hour later, we haven't moved much. I'm still cleaning out the closet, and Cookie is standing inside it opening and closing one of the doors (double sliding doors). Then genius decides to roll it over her foot. She immediately screams "Bee! Itsa bee!" (her remark for just about ANYTHING - when she sees a june bug, if she shows you a mosquito bite, an ouchie, anything. I sit down with her and then she her foot is covered with blood. Way to knock one out the park, Cookie! I get her cleaned up, and all is well for a little while.
Extremely-close-to-Jesus-and-a-cast moment #3:
That night, I'm helping TooCool with math homework. Cookie is sitting backwards in a chair at the table, singing and bouncing. Apparently she got a little too much bounce, and fell forward with the chair. No big deal, except her legs were stuck between the 2 wood panels on the back of the chair. I look down and see her legs all contorted. Doing what came logically, I jerked her out (wouldn't that have made it worse if they were broken?) and set her down to see if her legs still worked. She immediatley started hitting me and stomping for getting in her way. Guess she was fine.
And that, folks, is why I'm up for "Parent of the Year".