Monday, January 26, 2009

I'm coming out....

...of the virtual closet. No, I'm not gay (although I don't have the slightest thing against anyone who bats for a different team). I'm coming out of the "anonymous blog" closet. I turned in my letter of resignation at my office last week. I used to have an "open" blog, complete with my information (there's NO shame here!) but I had to close it down due to not being able to completely speak my mind, since I work for a church. Anyhow, my job will be ending soon, coinciding with the birth of our LAST child, so I figured now would be just a good a time as any to "come out".

I get so tired of having to try to remember the names I've made up for each member of our family....heck, most days I'm lucky if I can remember to send lunch with each of my kids to school, much less remember fake names and b.s. No thanks. So consider this to be my most boring post ever, but just a little fyi. :)

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Fun in virus-land

EVERYBODY in the family got sick over the weekend.

Friday night I didn’t feel good, so I had to cancel my plans to go to Shoguns (my favorite restaurant this month). I was totally pissed, but figured I’d go on Saturday.

Instead, Saturday afternoon Smartie started puking, and I thought (hoped and prayed) that it would be a 1-vomit episode, like Cookie had had a few days earlier….but NOOOOOOO. The girls, my mom and I loaded up in the car to go to the grocery store, and while my mom was inside Smartie decided to puke in the car. I had given her a bag just in case she needed to puke, but apparently when you’re 4 years old, your brain flies out the window and you forget how to even OPEN a bag, so you puke all over the bag (and yourself, and the car) instead. THAT was fun. She proceeded to puke a bazillion times more. Shogun’s was cancelled once again, and I was even more pissed (hey – I’m selfish, what can I say) It was a f’ing conspiracy for me NOT to go to Shoguns. Instead I ordered takeout from Roadhouse (my 2nd favorite place to eat), but I wasn’t entirely happy since I was already set on Shoguns. We headed home that evening, and I expected everything would be better by Sunday.

What in the piss was I thinking? Smartie woke up feeling fine, and Peabody went to church. I woke up with pains in my side, so I loaded up the girls and went to my parents house. Peabody met me there after church, and I decided to go to the hospital since I figured I was having stoner issues, lol (kidney stones). The doctors confirmed it was, in fact, a stone, and that I was having trouble passing it because the baby was laying on the tube it was trying to pass through. Little heathen. They said it would have a better chance of passing if I laid on my left side only (the stone was on the right). Only problem was, I couldn't lay down AT ALL without puking.

After I’d been at the hospital for an hour or so, I called Peabody to check in on things. Then he told me he was sick, throwing up no less. Figures! I finally got out of GSMC a few hours later (they said I could stay with a pain pump, or go home with pain meds). I decided to go home to try to help with the kids since Peabody was faking it (and I'm a freaking SAINT!). He was sick as a dog, and we all stayed at my parents house Sunday night. I was up all night long with reflux issues, throwing up every time I tried to lay down. THAT was fun.

Monday morning I had my 30-week pregnancy visit, but after that I took the rest of the day off since I’d had NO sleep, and was still hurting from the stone (and then I got the stupid virus too!). Do you know how uncomfortable it is to puke and dry heave with a BABY in your belly?

I was up again all Tuesday night with reflux, and resorted to sitting straight up to try to get some sleep. All it did was make my neck hurt.

Today everyone seems to be much better. I'm pretty sure I passed the stone. I got my reflux medicine refilled, FINALLY, and with insurance (which knocked it from $124 to $50). Protonix is like GOLD!!!!! Everyone has quit puking, and I finally got a good night's sleep last night.

Let's see who can be the first to piss me off today! :)

Thursday, January 8, 2009

25 Things

I was acutally tagged to do this on my facebook account, but I thought I'd share it with you wonderful people as well. Since I can't say ALOT about myself on here, at least for another month or two, I can give you this information:

1. If I didn’t have scoliosis, I would be 6’2”, instead of a measly 5’10” (no offense to the vertically challenged out there!)

2. I’ve always wanted to join the circus (imagine that!).

3. People piss me off so much these days, I think about biting my tongue off at least twice daily.

4. I know I shouldn’t get any more tattoos, since 10 is OBVIOUSLY enough, but I’m sure I will.

5. I got to see the Leeza show twice in REAL LIFE. This one girl brought her new product – a pump that you put on your lips a few times a day to make them fatter. Impressive, I tell you, impressive.

6. I’ve been told I “live an amazing life”. Sounds like someone wants a favor.

7. I’ve been skydiving twice.

8. Recently numerous innocent photo-girls were maimed and disfigured beyond all recognition because of a pregnancy-induced-psychotic-episode.

9. In March, I will once again be bald, and the mother of my 4th and FINAL child.

10. I could live at Six Flags.

11. I thrive on chaos.

12. I only take halfway-decent pictures on my left side. The right side (lazy eye, flared nostril, SERIOUS issues) of my face doesn’t cooperate with how great the left side thinks it is. I always have to feel my face to see which side the beauty mark is on, and that’s the one for the camera!

13. One time I was on a bridge in grid-lock traffic in Dallas. Smoke started coming up around me, and I felt sorry for the poor fool whose car overheated on the highway below me. About 2 minutes later my hood caught on fire. It was MY stupid car.

14. I’m pro-plastic-surgery like you cannot even BEGIN to imagine.

15. I’m also pro-medication. I’m quite certain there’s a medicine to fix any ailment. None of this “Oh, I’m so womanly I’m doing this birth crap au-natural.” Give me a flipping break.

16. When I was little I wanted to grow up and marry PeeWee Herman. Now THAT’S an aspiration!

17. Tomorrow I’ll have purple hair. Take THAT! UH!18. I love me some crème brulee.

19. Last year I was in an unfortunate accident called “eyelid-superglued-to-the-eyeball”.

20. I hate mini-vans. I know hate is a strong word, but I truly HATE mini-vans.

21. I never graduated high school. I stopped 2 months into my senior year and then got my GED. I started college the following year like I would have had I stayed in school.

22. My arms are double-jointed. And so is my brain.

23. Almost everything I own is black or brown. Hey, black is slimming!

24. I have some crazy-cow-lick business going on in the front of my hair, which helps my perfect my poof (when I have hair).

25. I can rap Sugar Hill Gang’s “Rapper’s Delight” like nobody’s business.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

It's time to take it all off!

Your hair, that is!

It’s almost time for St. Baldrick’s 2009. This year it will be held on Saturday, March 14th, from 12:00 – 3:00 p.m. at FUMC in Gladewater, Tx (or you can visit to find a location near you!)

Be brave and get bald! Absolutely NO excuses!!!!! It’s just hair, and it will grow back. If you’re insecure, buy a wig (or a sack!). This is all about the kids, and I plan on driving all of you so insane that you’ll agree to shave your head just so I’ll shut up and leave you alone. I don’t care if you don’t like me, don’t want to, blah, blah, blah. This is a great cause, and if you don’t agree, I don’t care. You’ll get over it.

Last year we raised just over $5,000, which completely blew me away. After all, the first amount I put on the website was only $250. I’d say we knocked that one out of the park! This year I’m upping the ante to $6,000, which should be no problem.

A few new things have been added this year. You can always visit the St. Baldrick’s website and buy t-shirts, mugs, mouse pads, license plates, shirts, etc. with the St. Baldrick’s logo.

You can also visit, and designate the St. Baldrick’s Foundation as your charity of choice. Part of the proceeds of each purchase you make will help cure childhood cancer. Merchants include Apple iTunes, Barnes and Noble, Best Buy, Dale and Thomas Popcorn, Linens & Things, the Museum Store, Macy’s, PETsMart, Sharper Image, Toys R Us, and many more. You can even book your next trip with Expedia or Orbitz. When you enter this online mall, you’ll go right to each merchant’s own website to shop, and you’ll see upfront what percentage of your purchase price will come to the St. Baldrick’s Foundation. (Percentages vary by store; the average is 8%.) There’s even a page to show “Today’s Bargains.” So shop your heart out and help kids with cancer with every purchase! To join, go to, and designate the St. Baldrick’s Foundation as your designated charity. (Hint: On the “join” page, choose California for the location and Children & Youth for your category, with keyword “Baldricks.")

Also, if you’re online EVER, is like any other search engine (and it’s powered by Yahoo!), but every search you make can generate funds for the St. Baldrick’s Foundation. Here’s how it works: Go to and type "St. Baldrick’s Foundation" into the "I support" box. Now every time you use GoodSearch to search the web, a portion of its advertising revenue will be shared with St. Baldrick’s. To see how much GoodSearch users have generated for St. Baldrick’s, click on “amount raised,” once you’ve designated us as your organization of choice. Spread the word and surf the net for kids with cancer!

As you can see, there are MANY ways this year to become involved, but I would LOVE to see EVERY ONE of you with a shiny noggin on March 14th. Go bald or bust!!!!!